Three Word Movie Reviews: Sucker Punch

Sucker Punch vs Limitless

Out of these two movies, Sucker Punch clearly was more promoted.  It appeals to a wide range of audience because guys like tits and ass fighting off anything that comes their way.  And for the girls Vanessa Hudgens is in it.  One thing that you should pay more attention to is this one promo because it makes more sense than out of any of the trailers.  I love how it says "you will be unprepared" because that's exactly what you feel.

As for Limitless the plot is-obviously-more constructed.  No, you don't watch any robot fighting action, but what you get is an interesting scenario that later gets a little too out of hand.  Neither of them make any sense, but if I had to go with which one is more realistic, it would have to be Sucker Punch.  Doesn't mean it's any better though.

Now how the hell could a movie about burlesque, fake names, girls fighting off steampunk Nazis and dragons be more realistic than a movie based on a medical theory be more realistic?  To be fair the main character goes insane through irony.  She accidentally kills her sister after trying to save her then is sent to a mental hospital and makes up her own fantasy world within another fantasy world.  After enough time spent in her own fantasy, she believes it and needs to get out.  

The main problem I had with this movie was how it tried to be too many genres at the same time.  While it had a good excuse to have so many random fantasy worlds within the movie, it wasn't executed correctly.  There were a few things that I did like about it, but if I had to redo this whole production, personally I would just take out the whole main story about how she was really sent to a mental hospital and instead was placed in a brothel.  It was like watching a movie that was a flashback within a flashback.  Only Inception did a good job of layering like this so many times, and Sucker Punch to me was trying to mimic that effect with resulted in failure.

Limitless was way more interesting to watch.  The plot surrounds the idea of a pill that can unlock a human's mind to 100% potential versus the average 20%, which the average mind does normally.  Bradley Cooper did a good job with what he had to work with although the movie itself wasn't really that great (to me it was a little above average however).  While the movie was based on NZT-48 (the name of the drug), you get to see how this drug consumed the main character's life.

It was thrilling, but the ending does fool with your intension on how it was supposed to end.  Many events within the storyline makes the drug more and more inhuman and unholy when it plays around with peoples' emotions and their actions.  But instead of the expected, this had to end somehow, you will learn how the main character succeeds in keeping it all: the drugs, the love of his life, and a really fantastic job while normally everyone knows that this is impossible.

But after seeing Sucker Punch, my appreciation for Limitless was greatly enhanced.  I probably would have rather seen Diary of a Wimpy Kid 2 if I knew how completely random Punch was when I went to go see it last night.  But in the mean time I will just wait for the last Harry Potter to come out.  Or Fast Five.  Or Conan.

Sandwich Artists in the 21st Century

I went to Subway recently and saw that they started serving soups.  There was a little plastic pot case with small cups so you can sample what they got.  The sign said something like "Try our new soups!  Please take a cup and ask your sandwich artist for a sample."

No, you're not a sandwich artist.  You're a waitress/waiter at Subway.  When I had a min wage job at an ice cream place, I didn't call myself an ice cream artist or anything stupid like that; I was called a waitress.  And yes, I know, sometimes when you have these booth type positions you also have to clean, stock, and all that jazz, but that still doesn't mean that you have to have a "flight attendant" claim where you are entitled to have a better title for what you do while you go to school.  And most of these people are young kids who still don't have their foot in the real world door to get a career, and they will someday.  Don't let the economy get you down, guys.  Unless if you have been there for 14 years, then I will still not recognize this as a "sandwich artist" case. 

Flight attendants and custodians are the only ones who should have this privilege of having a better title because they actually have a better paid job doing this and they usually stick to it for many years.  I still think that stewardess and janitors are still acceptable job titles, but at least these people travel and deal with jobs that asshole people born with a spoon in their mouth don't want to deal with.  They aren't poor; they get money for good work. 

So to hell with these titles.  Baristas also piss me off.  I don't care if you have to acquire a skill to brew coffee; you get that through a month's worth of training and so forth then you end up quitting two years later anyway.  At least flight attendants have to deal with working while being thousands of miles into the air and possible turbulence.  If they even spill a coffee, it could end up in someone's face. 

Blast from the 21st Century: Beyond Good and Evil

Hey everyone, it's hardcopy with another quick update and post.  Sorry it's been so long, but my hard drive just came in and it should be up and running by Sunday.  Also we are close to 2000 views!  CONFETTI FOR ALL.

But it's been a while since I have been on a good video game buzz, and replaying Beyond Good and Evil by Ubisoft is definitely making me feel good.  I'm super duper into this game, and eventually the second one will come out and kick all of your candy asses.

Unfortunately since sales haven't been fantastic for this game, it was rumored that the sequel wouldn't be published as quickly as I hoped, and then after it was close to getting completely cancelled.  But after this leaked trailer came out (this isn't the first one mind you), the rumor of another Beyond creamed everyone's jeans once it became a reality.  And by everyone I mean the small amount of people who actually played the first game.  And I know what you are allllll thinking.  This looks a lot like Mirror's Edge, doesn't it?  Well seeing that that game was a first person, then no.  It's not.  Plus who makes a first person platformer?  That's such a terrible idea.

In the mean time I suggest that you play through the first one.  It's awesome and focuses on stealth rather than just platforming.  Plus her uncle's a pig.  What's not to like?  I'd say if you have really good  direction and skills at sneaking around without getting killed by giant laser guns (in some rooms/levels), then this game wouldn't take you longer than an afternoon.  But if you want to get all the pearls you can, go do it.  Because you get a fun mini game engined by Rastafari rhinos. 

By the way, you get money every time you photograph different species in Hillys, where the game mostly takes place.  Once you get all of the species, then you get an M-disc, but I still can't find the last animal.  URGH!!!  After seven years I still can't find this damn son of a bitch!  And that's why I keep playing through this game.